One of the best things that my husband (Jack) and I recognised early on when deciding to elope, was that a wedding isn’t actually a marriage. The wedding is just the celebration that marks the beginning of a new life together and knowing that there aren’t actually any rules on how that is done really helps take the edge off. If like us, you want to avoid feeling stressed out (or in debt), then read on to find out the 4 things you need to know about eloping.
The average wedding cost in the UK sits at a whopping £30,000 ($65,000 in Australia) – it’s a huge amount of money to spend on a one-day event. Whilst to some this may seem a fair price for a big party to celebrate your marriage with all your loved ones (after all you ideally only get married once!) for Jack and I, not only was it not an option budget wise, but we both valued spending the money elsewhere. We didn’t have the cheapest elopement as we still wore traditional wedding attire, had a photographer and videographer, had to pay for hotels etc – but we probably spent a fraction of what we would have spent if we’d had a full wedding and we were lucky that our families chipped in to help.
Speaking of family, there is the chance that you may upset or offend people with your decision not to have them there on your special day. Thankfully this wasn’t the case for us, both sets of parents were understanding of why we decided to elope, but its worth knowing that there is always the chance that someone might get upset. We chose to tell our close family before we eloped, not for approval – but we felt it was the most respectful thing to do. That said, its more traditional to elope and then tell the family – and generally this way you avoid having people try to bully you out of it. Most people are able to put their feelings to one side and just want to help celebrate afterwards, a party or dinner is a nice way to include family and friends post event.
You Get To See Your Partner
One of my favourite parts about our day, was that I actually got to spend the day with Jack. With traditional weddings, you’re generally separated before the wedding and so busy mingling with guests at the reception that you barely get to spend any quality time with your partner. In contrast, Jack and I started our wedding day with a walk on the beach and a gorgeous breakfast in the rainforest. I had my makeup and hair done whilst he relaxed, and then we drove to the venue together. We didn’t spend a moment apart and that’s how I wanted the day to be – about the two of us.
The benefit of eloping isn’t just the costs saved, it’s the flexibility to do whatever you want. You can make it a destination elopement, and roll your wedding and honeymoon into one – without worrying whether family or friends can make it out there. Just make sure if you do elope abroad, that you have the right documentation to marry outside of your own country.
Nowadays, elopements aren’t just for those that want to runaway, they are for those looking to save money, for introverts, for those that want to avoid family drama, for anyone. The bottom line is you don’t have to explain your love story to anyone either, if eloping feels best for your relationship, then the opinions of anyone else shouldn’t matter. For us, it was the best decision ever. We had a beautiful stress-free day that was spent together – I wouldn’t change it for the world!
What are your thoughts on eloping?